2010-Preseason Look, Projected Finishes

By: Josh Perdew, ESFL Insider Correspondent

Welcome eSFL owners and all Sports fans to 2010's first edition of eSFL Insider.




As the draft, two-a-days, and preseason are now behind us, I want to take a quick look at the two divisions and each team in it. I will break down each team and list a few studs and duds and project overall records as Week One is upon us.

As most of you know, or should know, the Global division has won ever Ballistic Bowl since the league split into two divisions. With that being said, lets get right to it and start with that division.....

Global Division:

Defending Champions D Crownholders are looking to become only the 3rd team in the history of the ESFL to repeat as champions. They are RB heavy with Benson, Grant, and Tomlinson. Favre will command his troops at QB and Finley should be a nice solid TE. His defense is somewhat weak as he currently has one player that retired this year on his roster. If Revis plays, he will be good but not great and Matthews is his only real pass rusher. He has a long list of duds….His team will finish outside the playoff cut with a record of 3-11….

Zima Ruskies are looking to take back the title he once held back in ‘04 but he lacks the power in the Global to do so. He took arguably the best QB in the league with Drew Brees and loaded up the TE position with both Gates and Clark but his running backs, receivers, and defense are average except for Jared Allen. Sharper and Pace are both duds. Zima finishes the season with a 4-10 record and looks to rebuild next season.

Boot Hill Balut, 2008 champs, had one of the worst drafts coach Rhodes has ever had in his long ESFL tenure. Aaron Rodgers is solid at QB and Calvin Johnson should rebound from a bad season to emerge as a top receiving threat. We know Wayne is solid and Naanee should be pretty good. His defense is decent with Briggs and Williams. Duds include Porter, Samuel, and a long list of mediocre running backs. Rhodes is a proven winner in this league and could make the playoffs, but a championship at this point is out of reach as some teams behind him have too much power. He finishes with a 7-7 record and narrowly misses the playoffs.

McKinney Rednecks are jumping back into the league after a two season layoff. Coach McKinney has put together a solid team with Schaub, Turner, Colston, and Gonzo. His defense is solid as well with Woodson, Dawkins, Posluszny, and Dansby. The only duds I can find on his team are Blount and Walker. His team should finish with 8 wins and a playoff spot.

Frost Flurries, the 2007 champs, will feature a balanced attack with Adrian Peterson, Greg Jennings, Owen Daniels, and Carson Palmer. Coach Frost has a solid defense led by Laurinaitis, Ruud, Bell, and Flowers. He has a good team with not many duds. Frost will compete for the Global Division title but fall short by a game or two. He will finish with a record of 9-5 and head to the playoffs.

Temp’s Texas Boys have a top 4 team in this league every year. He puts together another solid lineup led by Peyton Manning, D. Williams, Boldin, P. Willis and A.J Atogwe. He has a couple of questionable TE’s and RB’s but should finish the season with a good record of 9-5 and a playoff spot.

Pardue Bruisermakers are this year’s power in the Global Division. Coach Ron has put together a balanced team with Kevin “Corn on the” Kolb, Gore, Charles, R. White, Celek, and defenders Pollard, Urlacher, and Ware. I see a couple of young guys that could make him unstoppable. Pardue rolls with his 10-4 record to the Ballistic Bowl championship game and looks to capture his 1st title.

Appalachian Division:

Viall Vigilantes, formally known as big “D”, is currently projected to finish dead last in the division and the entire league. Rumor has it Viall struggled to join the draft and ended up drafting two players that were rookie holdouts from the previous season and were restricted players. He ended up with a horrible draft due to this costly error and will struggle all season because of it. Viall has some bright spots with Randy Moss, David Harris and Champ Bailey. The best move he made in the preseason was trading off his top WR Reggie Wayne to Balut in exchange for a decent RB (Barber) and a fairly good WR (Harvin). He has developed some balance but not nearly enough power. A frightening 3-11 record and a Gunner Bowl draw is all he has to look forward to.

Whitmore’s Workhorses are a pretender in the division with a team of Flacco, Jackson, S. Green, and K. Winslow. His WR’s are a joke with Rice out half the season and his defense will hurt him all season with only one stud in James Harrison. Whit will be Gunner Bowl bound with a 5-9 record.

Texan Brusiers are another team that might turn some heads early in the regular season but fall apart down the stretch. His QB’s are shaky, his RB’s are iffy and he has the best WR in the business. Andre Johnson is an animal and his defense is solid. Peppers and Cole in the trenches, Beason in the middle, and Polamalu and Goldson are beasts. He will win at least 3 games with his defense. A 7-7 season for the Bruisers but fall short of the playoffs by one game and head to the Gunner Bowl.

Kav’s Kavanators, sporting his new logo and a bum squad of junk players, will steal two wins from the Texans and it should be enough to make the playoffs. Ray Rice is a stud as well as Jackson, but his brightest spot is on defense with Weddle. Weddle will look like Sharper from last season and win enough games for Kav to sneak into the playoff picture with a 7-7 record.

Perdew Pulverizers are looking to rebound from a disappointing season last year in which one more victory would have won him the last spot into the playoffs and eventually win the Ballistic Bowl. He has a good solid balanced team led by Rivers, McCoy, Marshall, and Fitzgerald. His defense has raised some eyebrows with Freeney and Wilson. He has no depth at QB beyond Rivers so look for an injury to likely put him out of the race for playoffs and title. If Rivers stays upright, the Pulverizers rally to the playoffs with a 9-5 record.

Gman, the new man, the rookie, has the best chance possible to win the division and quite possibly the Ballistic Bowl. Gman brings a solid group of players with Romo, C Johnson, Crabtree, Sims-Walker, Witten, and Lewis. He drafted two of the top rookie choices at RB with Matthews and Best. If these guys produce the numbers projected, Gman will roll to the division championship. A 10-4 record and shot at the title are certainly in sight.

And standing in the way is the Fields Fanatix. Coach Fields has a well known record in the league and should show us why this season. He drafted proven winners with Tom Brady, MJD, Welker, and Owens. He has a decent defense with Bob Sanders, D. Ryans, and L. Fletcher. Fields is a waiver wire genius. If you come across a player you need off the wire, you can bet on it, Fields probably has him already locked up. His team is always around when it’s time to perform and his squad will do it again this year. A 9-5 record is a solid record in the more balanced division and it should place him squarely in the middle of the pack for a playoff spot and possible title.





Playoffs??? Don’t talk about playoffs. Are you kidding me? Playoffs???

Yea that’s right folks, playoffs….Four teams from each division make the playoffs, but only two will play for the Ballistic Bowl Title.



Pardue will roll all over his weak ass division and beat Temp’s Texas Boys in the Global Division Championship game.



Perdew Pulverizers will pull the stunning victory over Fields Fanatix and then go on to knock out GMan for his 1st Appalachian Division title.



Setting up the Pardue / Perdew Ballistic Bowl XI, the Pardue Bruisermakers, will lift the trophy as this year’s champ.





I will be back next week with my Week One projections.